I don’t know about you, but I have asked God “why did this happen?” or “Why am I going through this?”
It’s hard not to question him when a family member has cancer, or a friend passes away, or we constantly fail. All these reasons seem fair to question what God is doing and more specifically “Why”. There are moments when you can even question if God is even there.
A few years ago my mom underwent open heart surgery. We prepared for this months ahead of time. The day came when it was time for the surgery and we were all ready, we knew how long the surgery was going to be, we knew the recovery time after surgery, we knew what could go wrong, but we also knew what could go right.
We all had our trust in God and trusted that he had the surgeons ability to do this in his hands. What we all expected was an 8-10 hour surgery, one week recovery at the hospital and a few months at home. That 8 hour surgery turned into two more surgeries in one month, one month at the hospital, endless days and nights, months of recovery after. All because the outcome we didn’t expect, became the reality.
Yes, there was a point when I didn’t think she was going to make it. And I remember very clearly, one of the few hours I got to go home from the hospital to shower and recharge a little, I sat on my bed and asked God “WHY?”
My faith was so little by then..
At that moment I didn’t understand the why. Even after God healed my mom and she’s been healthy for a few years now, even then the why was still present.
Not directly but indirectly. I still wondered why she had to go through so much, why we had to go through so much. I felt like I never got the answer.
Until recently I was driving to work after a meeting and I was just listening to Music when I heard God say “The process is the why”. I sat in my car wondering what do you mean the process?
Well what God means is that we always have to go through that middle part in order to reach our destination. In order to see his mighty hand, in order to understand his plan.
Just like Abraham had to wait to have a son, just like Moses had to wait to get to the promised land, just like Joseph had to wait and be a slave, just like Jesus had to be sacrificed in order for you and me to be saved.
Just like that, we have to wait. We have to wait for the miracle. Because sometimes the biggest blessing is at the end of that why, because even when your faith is so small, God can work with that.