Fear is a liar…

Fear is a reaction. Courage is a decision. -Winston S. Churchill

Just recently I had some sort of meltdown.  For some reason, that whole week I had been feeling very down. I was focusing on all the negative in my life rather than the positive. I started to evaluate my life based on all my mistakes and forgot about everything else.

You see, to me life goes in segments and every segment is different for everyone. We all accomplish our goals at different times. However, there are times when you can’t help it but compare yourself to others and what they have done with their life. You compare their “perfect” life to your “imperfect” life.

As I was feeling vulnerable and frail, the devil sent his little friend called Fear to attack me.

Fear comes to our lives in different forms. Sometimes fear holds us back from moving on from the past. We are scared to move on from certain situations or we simply are scared to open up to possibilities.  It puts doubt in us; it manipulates our thoughts.

Fear can steal our happiness. Fear can steal our goals. Fear can steal our futures.

That week of vulnerability in my life, I wanted nothing but to sleep and not think about the future. I was mad at those around me, like if they were the ones preventing me from achieving my goals. I was finding excuses to sabotage my own friendships and relationships.

I started listening to the lyrics of this very specific song that my sister had told me about. The song is “You Say” by Lauren Daigle. The part that touched me the most was:

“Remind me once again just who I am because I need to know,

You say I am loved when I can’t feel a thing,

You say I am strong when I think I am weak,

And you say I am held when I am falling short,

And when I don’t belong, oh, you say I am yours?

Honestly, that song changed it all. Cause just how the devil sends fear our way, God delivers signals our way. I felt that it was a way of God saying, “Hold on, girl. The only reason you haven’t met those certain goals is because you haven’t fully believed, you haven’t pursued them, you haven’t worked hard for them and you’re letting fear get in the way”. 

That moment totally changed my mind set. I was sitting in fear, in pity, in shame,  in anything that could hold me back from being happy. I was allowing fear to remind me of past mistakes, to bring back heartbreaks, to bring back fear of rejection. I was giving full and uncontrollably permission to the devil to work his way into my future.

And sometimes we allow that because our future seems so uncertain to us. It seems too hard to comprehend everything coming our way.  Life isn’t perfect. I am not saying that you will have a perfect life, because from time to time we will allow fear to scare us multiple times.

But that doesn’t change who you are. That doesn’t define who you are. What will define and determine who you are is the way you fight back; the way you break down those barriers. You will have to learn to open up to new possibilities without the fear of rejection, or the fear of failing again. Don’t be afraid of opening up.

Don’t let FEAR walk into your life and if it does, let it FEAR you!

It wont be easy, but it will be possible.